a. double goal

b. challenge limits

c. create a regular practice

d. raise your standards,values or beliefs

e. make it a game

3. GO THE PATH OF LEAST RESISTANCE-OR SHOW ME THE SHORTCUT Sometimes a goal deserves a break. TIME MAGAZINE reported that after 8 hours of sleep you'd be more than twice as likely to find a shortcut for solving a problem. Suggesting that taking it easy is good for brain, and what’s good for brain is good for overall psyche and soul. Are you doing too much, not getting nourished and being exhausted? Well perhaps its time to consider another path. Don’t re-invent wheel. Pick up a book written by an expert, join a group that's geared around your project, sign up for an informational newsletter , or ask someone to buddy up & help. For instance, if I was writing a screen-play and struggling with a self imposed deadline, I could simplify my project just by signing up for a writing class. What with weekly writing tasks & in-class exercises this alone would expedite development of my script. Another over looked short cut is to consider smaller steps. The smaller increments easier goal. Deng Ming-Dao, writes in EVERYDAY TAO, “An inch in one direction, then an inch in another already makes a span of 2 inches. Gradually we can improve on that.” Go path of least resistance, it’s a gift of energy.

a. don’t reinvent wheel-find someone who’s done it before

b. slow down or change pace

c. keep to minimum daily standards

d. write everything down--loose ideas vs. lost ideas

e. smaller increments easier goal

Knowing your own limitations is probably paramount to all of this. Nothing is more undermining than knowing you have overreached yourself, or under performed, or attempted something way too difficult and looked stupid. You are going to feel a bit lower than usual, so dont expect miracles. Set yourself achievable things to do each day.  If you genuinely feel you cannot possibly do something and are not chickening out, then get best person you can suited to task to help, but its best to try yourself, if at all possible as this builds knowledge even if you arent too brilliant first time, and knowledge builds up confidence, an upward spiral.

Being calm under pressure and making logical reasoned decisions may seem very smug things to say, and very difficult things to actually achieve. These both come down to being able to devote sufficient time to a given problem. You are not in a race, but it seems that way as there is so much adrenaline, yet thinking time often halves working time, and clear thinking brings relief from stress quicker than rushing on headlong and poorly directed. Many people have devoted much time and energy to time management, but its not just mumbo jumbo. I find I use lists. and I use a personal organiser now, where I used to rely on my memory, but its all one and same. A task is a task and for you it takes a set time to achieve, which gets longer as we get older, so we must not get annoyed when we cant do it as quickly or efficiently as we used to do when younger. Nevertheless it still takes a finite time, we should be aware of that and calm down to allow that time for that task. If in doubt then constructively and positively think for a while, rather than carry on regardless. A cup of tea can take five minutes, but thinking can save you fifty. Often it was hurtling along at breakneck pace and ever increasing workload that created problem in first place, all more reason to sit back a little and take stock of where we are, before yet again zooming off at a tangent. Often its only when you break away from backing you can see you were stuck in mould, and can see in quiet and still where frantic and noisy were headed. Just as nothing good lasts forever, then so nothing bad  does either, this WILL go away eventually, leaving you stronger and more confident to face future.

Just as drink or drugs is a day at a time, so problems are a finite bit by bit at a time.

Remember, we ALL have serious problems. We ALL get through them ok.

Never start thinking I deserve this, I have been bad, I should have done things differently, I am unworthy due to way ive lived my life. This is now, you are now, even if you have been bad news you can sort it, and start to be a useful person, now. Be positive for once in your life, this is grim, but I am going to get through it no matter what.

And you will.

Also remember, no one said life was fair, it isnt. Bloody awful things happen to very nice people.

I have lost friends and I still cant really grasp they are gone, I guess I find this hardest to cope with as its one you can do least about, but I know they wouldnt want me moping about, any more than ill want anyone moping over me, long live wakes. Plus harping over past ignores todays friends and family, who are still here and need you too.

This might read a bit antiseptic. For 1 do this, for 2 do that, but in a way you have to try to break it down that way to deal with it, as it can seem overwhelming as a whole but achievable in bits. Cathedrals are made of stones.

There are no easy solutions, but sleep, organisation, time management, and a calm positive attitude will go a long way to sorting things out.

Also, identifying unachievable tasks and ignoring them in favour of things you can directly do and affect will be instantly productive and ease pressure quickly, however most of all you have to realise that at end of day, it is your problem and chances are YOU are going to have to sort it out, sometimes alone.

But you WILL sort it out, with belief in yourself.

Also, sadly, there is only so much you can do for friends, before they too have to start helping themselves. Many will have you tearing yourself to pieces on their behalf, who would do very little to help you in turn.

This might sound harsh, but there is a limit to how much you can help someone before they become dependent on your help for evermore. This doesnt help them anyway, as from what has been said before, they only gain by experiencing pleasure of overcoming their own demons, and pride and confidence this gives them in having done so relatively unaided.

Help people to help themselves, they will be better able then to help you help yourself in future.

Its a cruel world, sometimes there is just you between you and oblivion.

But that should be enough.

You can win.

When all I had was turning bad, When night seemed endless dark, When fire died deep down inside, And cried out for a spark, When all seemed, dire bad dreams, Through every tormented hour, And I seemed small, viewed overall, Puny against great power, Then I regained my former flame, Kindled against these mighty forces, Though alone, all on my own, Against fates cavalry and horses, Twas then my power seized hour, And nightmare ran off screaming, It was purely me that set me free, Though I may only have been dreaming.

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