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POSTURE HAS MEANING
Ready to settle in with your Middle Eastern client? As an American, you’re likely most comfortable sitting back in your chair and crossing your legs. Well, don't! In Middle East, one of most insulting things you can do is sit with your legs crossed so bottom of your foot is pointed in other person's direction. The foot is dirtiest part of body and sole of shoe is dirtiest of low. According to Michael Lee, to show someone bottom of your foot means you're looking for a fight!
WHEN IS A HANDSHAKE NOT A HANDSHAKE?
Even hand-shaking cultures such as England, France, Germany, Italy and US do it differently.
Brits prefer a brief but firm handshake. The French prefer a light grip while sharing one gentle single shake that is quickly withdrawn. Germans will give a very firm handshake -- just one "pump" then quick withdrawal. More than one shake with Germans or French is considered aggressive. Italians will shake hands and then hug friends or kiss them on both cheeks. In many southern US states, it is not customary to shake hands with women.
WHEN YOU ASSUME YOU MAKE AN A**-out of U and ME
Bear in mind other person may be trying to accommodate to your culture, so don't assume they will use their traditional greeting.
For example, if you start first, for instance bowing, and then see a hand extended for a shake, and switch to that, other person will then have switched to a bow and this becomes awkward. For many cultures such "awkwardness" will kill deal early on. When you put someone in an awkward position, they "lose face."
DISTANCE HAS MEANING TOO
Different cultures have different preferred distances for interacting. If someone moves in closer than you’re accustomed to, or comfortable with, stay ground, because if you automatically draw back other person can be offended.
The Chinese tend to stand closer than Americans because of crowded spaces in China. Middle Easterners typically stand barely a foot away. They operate on principle “I want to feel your breath on my face.” The more formal Japanese tend to bow at about 3’ away, and then step back another foot. Don’t advance into their space if you want to build relationship. India has some complex rules of distance because of caste system, so hold back and observe what other person plans to do. Germans are perhaps most guarded of their personal space.
THE CRITICAL FIRST MOVE IN RELATIONSHIP IS THE GREETING SO DON’T BOTCH IT
Begin with a polite word or two, such as "Mr. and Mrs. Taekwondo, it's such a pleasure to finally meet," and then wait to see what happens. When they make their move, mirror it, by bowing, shaking hands, giving abrazo, or nothing! Use your intuition! When in doubt, err on side of conservatism.
Some information is from Michael Lee's excellent book, "Opening Doors".
Susan Dunn, The EQ Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc , offers individual and executive emotional intelligence coaching, business EQ culture programs, distance learning, and EQ Alive! ( http://www.eqcoach.net ) training for coaching emotional intelligence. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for FREE eZine.