Ten Tips for Writing Your Perfect Wedding VowsWritten by Rev. M. Maureen Killoran, Unitarian Universalist minister
1.Start with a nice clean piece of paper (lavender is good, but any kind will work). Down left side of page, write numbers 1-10. Now – without stopping to think about it, fill in this page! Write down first 10 things that come to mind in response to this sentence: “I love (my partner’s name) because . . . “ Set this piece of paper aside.2.Now – how about YOU? What do YOU bring to this union? What promises will you make? Take another sheet of paper, and write ‘em down – don’t worry about spelling, grammar, or anything else at this point. Just write down 4-5 things you want to promise this very special person with whom you want to spend your life. •Do you promise to be there in bad times as well as good? •Do you promise to be faithful with your body as well as with your mind and heart? •Do you promise to support your partner even when he/she isn’t perfect? •Do you promise to share all your resources? Some? •What about if he/she gets sick? What about if you have a serious fight? You get idea . . . what are you promising in this union? 3.Think about language you will use to claim your partner and name your relationship. When you introduce your beloved, what words will you use? Husband? Wife? Spouse? Partner for Life? What energy does each of these have for you? If you don’t like one for some reason, throw it out. . . but before you start writing you vows, decide . . . what language will you use? This is a decision you need to make together . . . so start early, and give this as much time as it takes. 4.OK, after you’ve done steps 1-3, and you’ve got at least two pages of writing and one decision made – set it all aside. Do something else, preferably with your partner, and preferably fun. Like Christmas trees, weddings get too much “stuff” hung on them, Make yours beautiful, by stepping aside from stress for a day or two. Go out and remember WHY you love . . . go and play. 5.Done that? Now it’s time to make a BIG DECISION. Are each of you going to write your own vow, or do two of you want to say same thing? You don’t have to, you know – some of most beautiful ceremonies I’ve celebrated had each partner saying something different . . . But here’s a trick: If you’re each creating your own unique vow, why not insert a sentence at end symbolizing fact that you come together as unique individuals, and, without surrendering your individuality, you are creating a beautiful, shared union. Here’s an example of words each partner might use to complete his or her unique vow:
| | How to reduce your risk of becoming a victim of sexual assaultWritten by Tonya Genison Prince
The ultimate value of life depends upon awareness, and power of contemplation rather than upon mere survival- Aristotle Sexual assault is non-consensual sexual contact. Women, men and children of all ages can be victimized by sexual assault. A rapist may be a stranger, acquaintance, or relative. In 1998, U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Statistics reported that roughly 18% or 17.7 million women had experienced rape or attempted rape at some point in their lifetime. While there is no absolute protection against sexual assault, there are precautions you can take to help reduce your risk of being sexually assaulted by a stranger. Here are an important few: ·Close and lock your doors even during summer months. ·Wear clothes and shoes that allow you to move quickly ·When walking, project an assertive image and walk confidently. ·Familiarize yourself with your surroundings and try to think about where you will go if you find that you must make a quick getaway. ·Always have your key available and ready when approaching your home or car doors. Remember also that a key in between your fingers can serve as a weapon. ·If someone attacks you, yell “fire” rather than “help.” ·Try not to allow yourself to drop your guard if someone that you do not know approaches you with a question. Often strangers will ask a question like “Excuse me, do you know what time it is?” "How do I get to route 301 from here?” or say something like “It sure is hot out here!” In spite of this distraction, try to keep your guard up. ·Avoid walking alone, especially after dusk. Most people are more at risk of being assaulted by people who know them. Between 70-80% of all sexual assaults occur at hands of someone that victim knows. Share these important suggestions to help reduce risk of acquaintance rape: ·Know that it can happen to you or someone you love. Ignoring reality may further increase risk.
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