Smart reindeer know that "office party" is an oxymoron. Brush up on your EQ at Work Etiquette before you go, because Senior Management is going to be making a list and checking it twice to see who's naughty and who's nice.1. Twas
night before
office holiday party
And you are getting a good night’s sleep after having chosen an appropriate outfit, and gone over your EQ (social skills) because you, Smart Elf that you are, understand “office party” is an oxymoron. You’re going to work and you’re going rested and prepared, just like any other work day.
2. Rudolph
Red-Nosed Reindeer?
Remember, he didn't get to play reindeer games. Drink little or none at all. You’re being watched and you need your wits about you.
3. Frosty
Snowman was a jolly, happy soul.
Fine line again. It’s that old “business” and “party” combined. Don’t be cold and “businesslike,” it’s time to be warm and congenial. Act like you’re glad to be there! Make it a point to talk with as many folks as you can. But it isn't
time to ask for a promotion or raise by trying to do a "snow job" on your boss.
4. Mama in her kerchief and you in your WHAT??
Spare us, spare your job. Dress appropriately. We don’t want to see your hairy chest, new tattoo, naval, cleavage, or
top 12” of your thigh. And neither does
CFO. You should aim for a festive-but-professional look.
5. HO HO HO
Be full of merry seasonal conversation-starters, like “Did you know that ‘mistletoe’ means ‘dung-on-a-stick’?” j.k. I mean that’s what it does mean, but you might want to save that one. Well, it's "twig," but I ask you, does it matter what your dung is skewered on?
Okay, how about this? Mistletoe etiquette dictates that after you kiss under it, you remove a berry. When all
berries are gone,
kissing is over. However, don’t eat
berry or your kissing days will be permanently over. Holly berries and every part of
mistletoe are poisonous. Now isn’t that interesting? No?
How about this,
ritual of cutting
mistletoe from
oak came to symbolize
emasculation of
old King by his successor, so if there’s going to be some “down-sizing” or a major office coup d'etat …