The mind is like small child, who accepts and takes for granted whatever it sees or hears, without judgment and without considering consequences. If you let your mind behave as it likes and give it complete freedom, you lose your freedom.

We are constantly flooded with thoughts, ideas and information coming through five senses, other people, newspapers and TV. These thoughts, ideas and information penetrate mind whether we are aware of this process or not.

This outside flow influences our behavior and reactions. It influences way we think, our preferences, likes and dislikes. This means that we let outside powers shape our lives. So where is freedom?

Most people think and believe that their thoughts originate from them, but have they ever stopped and considered whether their thoughts, desires, likes and dislikes are really theirs? Maybe they are outside influences that they have unconsciously accepted?

If there is no filter to process thoughts that enter mind, there is no freedom. Then all actions are like actions of a puppet on a string, though no one will admit it.

You may object and say that thoughts that pass through your mind are yours, but are they? Have you deliberately and attentively created every thought that entered your mind?

When we accept total responsibility for our lives, we begin to understand that we create these situations, and we create them for a reason. While we cannot control actions or behaviors of others, we can control our emotional response. With that perspective in mind, we start to look at these situations as opportunities for growth and change that they really are.

Here are some simple questions to ask yourself when you find yourself responding emotionally in a way that you don't like. One of these questions (sometimes two!) will probably allow you to release emotional response and get on with your life.

1. Is it them?

What if whatever person said or did that pushed your button wasn't about you, but about them? What would that mean? Sometimes we play a role for others in their development, offering them an opportunity to grow and change. If we ask these questions, how does answer leave us feeling? Does seeing that whatever happened is a reflection of them and not us help?

Feel calmer? Send a prayer to bless and release other person, providing them support to work through their issue, but in a way that does not involve you emotionally.

2. Are they a mirror?

What action or behavior of other person reminds you of you, of an action or behavior that you don't like or are ashamed of? Can you recognize yourself at all in other person's behavior? When we are uncomfortable about a behavior, we sometimes ask (unconsciously, of course) someone to mirror that behavior to keep us in check. Seeing someone else take selfishness to extreme serves as a good reminder to us to keep that occasional selfish act at bay. The problem is twofold. One, on a scale of 1 to 100, we tend to perform problem behavior on a 5 or 10, but we ask someone who operates on a 90 or 95 to be our mirror. Second, we forget that we asked them to be our mirror and we get lost in injustice of their behavior. Do you see a connection? Be brutally honest with this one.

Feel calmer? Write a postcard to other person. You won't send it, you'll burn it. In postcard, release person from contract. Thank them for providing service, but tell them you no longer need it as you are now aware of issue. You now understand that you do not have to keep yourself in check way you thought you did. When you burn postcard, do a prayer to bless and release both of you to proceed forward with your lives, either separately or together in a healthy, happy way.

3. Is a value being violated?

Very often our deepest emotional responses come when one of our values is being violated. This is actually one of clues to help you identify your values. Pay attention to when absence of something (like respect or justice) pushes your button. It is probably one of your core values.

Feel calmer? Identify ways to bring this value into your life in a more active way. Identify at least one major goal that is linked to this value and start taking action on it.